Tentativeness: how to convince more without just promising

Before the article:

• If  You did not participate in our course, this article is for you. You should read it then practice Because the technique is a bit Hard to understand but easy to apply..
• If Yes, you participated In the course, and you are graduates, I recommend that you remember what we learned about a tentative answer as a technique Dealing with questions when you don't know the answer. 

The tentative technique - for beginners

So what exactly is 'tentative'? The definition of the word is 'conditional' or 'indefinite'. For example, when I want to schedule a meeting with several people who are not all present, then we 'tentatively' set it for Sunday, knowing that the date may change.

That is why speaking tentatively in front of an audience means leaving room for retreat or change if we are not 100% sure of what we are saying. I started teaching the tentative technique when I helped students in a course who were afraid to face questions from the audience even on a subject in which they were experts for fear that if they didn't know everything, the audience would judge them harshly. The tentative technique (and other techniques you learn in the course for dealing with when you don't know an answer) means that they will give an answer as best they can but make sure to qualify it.

For example, if you ask me how many students attended the school, my automatic answer will be 'close to 1,900'. For most audiences this is a sufficient answer and I usually use it without problems. I teach in the course that the technique is not appropriate when accuracy is necessary, for example my accountant will want a completely accurate answer, and then I will have to go into accounting and tell her exactly (1,879, as of April 2014).

The tentative technique - for the advanced

Some people don't feel comfortable with giving answers 'roughly' and on the other hand, they deal in fields where there are many types of information that are uncertain, or they just sometimes need to talk about subjects they are not experts in.

Let's say I need to talk about a course that will open in March, but I'm not sure about that (and anyway, what project finishes on time these days?). I can't say "I am." Sure that it will open in March" because I'm not sure, but I can say "I am Sure that he supposed to open in March". The small difference here is that I allow myself to say that I am sure because I added the disclaimer.

Politicians use this technique a lot. It allows them to use words like 'sure', 'certainly' or 'no doubt' which they really like, while at the same time it allows them to avoid responsibility (or in the example I gave, to blame it on someone else).

Want more explanation or practical practice?  
Join one of the groups our. We called now 077-8200201